I find myself getting lost or caught up in things that really do nothing but pass time. No real accomplishments, nothing. This is something I have never done. I have always had a "plan" a "motive" a "focus" an "goal". But these days, it's just "make it through another day". I find it hard to even stay focused in much of anything except the loss of Dayton. the one thing I would like to get my mind off if even for just a small moment.
As I set and look back on everything that has happened, I know in my heart that everything happens for a reason. I find it hard to understand. It is like I am stuck in this tunnel where I "know" what God's Word says; and I KNOW it is true; but yet I find it hard to grasp how anything good could possible come from it. I know that it is "good for the kingdom" kind of good. But to comprehend how in the world any of this can be good for the kingdom is confusing to me. So I find myself lost in the small black hole of confusion. Not knowing where to go from here. Not knowing how to move on from here. I set and stare at scripture, reading article after article trying to find some type of revelation. I know in my heart it is there, I just haven't found it yet.
I have decided I am going to start the blog. I have been trying to get more of the "past" together but I feel like God is telling me to get this going. So this is what my "plan" is (now keep in mind these days my plans usually don't pan out very well so bear with me here). I am going to start trying to post daily. If I have wrote something, I will post it, if now I will post something from the past.
I pray that God guides me through this and helps me to make it pleasing to Him.
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